What Does a New York Times Best Seller & QuayPhysio Have in Common? Intrigued?!?

I was recently talking with some buddies about a book written by Gary Chapman called The 5 Love Languages;  The Secret to Love That Lasts!  Yes please I hear you all cry!  Now, before you switch off or are reduced to hysterics thinking I’m even more bonkers than I am,  many people think there is a lot to it.  With over 11 million copies sold it has definitely made an impact on the world stage.  It has been on the New York Times Bestsellers list since 2009 and definitely isn’t just a book you’d find piled high getting dusty at the service station newsagent.

It’s premise is based on loving relationships with partners but is also totally applicable when developing connection with anyone in other settings. It has resources for counselling,  the military and also business.

The theory is that everyone has 1 primary and 1 secondary love language out of the 5, that they most strongly identify with and when expressed aids connection,  makes you feel loved and appreciated.  This is the simple version.  These 2 love languages are also the ones that you default to express your love and appreciation to others.

The 5 Love Languages are as follows:

1. Words of Affirmation eg; I love you, you look beautiful

2. Acts of Service eg; putting the bins out, fixing the shelves, doing to laundry or ironing

3. Receiving Gifts – self explanatory

4. Quality Time eg: doing a hobby together, prioritising time spent together hanging out

5. Physical Touch eg; holding hands, stroking hair, hugging etc!

By completing a simple test (click here) you will find out the 2 love languages that make you to feel most connected and loved.  These will be your automatic default in connecting to others.

It is likely you can now see that when each person in the relationship,  whether it’s a loving one or a business one etc,  expresses their language in a different way it can be easy to feel disconnected,  unappreciated and unloved.  By understanding both your own and the 2 love languages of those around you,  we can modify our behaviour to make them feel loved and appreciated and therefore have better connection and relationships all round!  Simples.

So,  why am I telling you this?  Well,  I was fortunate enough to have a massage the other day with the lovely Hanna,  our new massage therapist.  I felt a sudden overwhelming need to cry.  I obviously didn’t and stuffed it down into the emotional vaults I keep locked up on such occasions when I don’t want to let my tears out!  I have developed quite a talent for this over the years however am well aware it isn’t a very healthy habit!  Something to address at some point I’m sure.

Anyway,  afterwards I was reflecting on what the hell happened?!  Not wanting a repeat emotional melt down but also knowing I benefited greatly from some human therapeutic touch.  I was having a lovely massage. Why cry? Then it dawned on me…

When I completed my Love Language test a few years back,  my number 1 resounding language was physical touch. When Hanna started massaging me,  I felt cared for,  looked after, appreciated even. Physically connecting to another human is so healthy in many many ways.  The power of touch is HUGE! Have a read on the hormones and biochemistry behind it. There is no denying the impact it can have.

I,  like so many of you guys spend the vast majority of time caring for others.  I don’t have anyone at home to care for me on a daily basis,  making me feel connected,  appreciated and loved.  Evelyn has not so far been much of a hugger.  She is far too busy for that!  Most physical touch from her is normally reserved for a good wrestle when trying to get her dressed or a tickle-fest! There is the occasional “so tired I can’t move” lean in’s when watching tv but you can never be sure how long these will last.

So,  the lovely massage I had made me feel good because I was receiving my top way of feeling connection.  Hooray. Thank you Hanna. I will be back again next week…and every other week until Mr Right walks my way!

Finally, being in the profession I am,  I see the power of touch every day and the incredible impact it makes on peoples lives.  It is huge in how it can affect our overall health and wellbeing. Again read some of the science.  That is why we believe manual therapy whether that is from Physio or massage is vital in keeping you mobile, independent and not reliant on pain killers. It’s impact is far bigger than just the mechanical effects it has on our muscles and other tissues.

So,  if you feel the need to be cared for, for a change, or you, like me, are not getting enough physical touch in your day then book in to see us.  We have so many options for your at the HealthHub to make you feel good.  Because after all, isn’t that what life should be about?

For more information or if you have any questions please don’t hesitate to contact us on 01548 852355 or email [email protected].

Now I’m off to listen to some Beatles “I wanna hold your hand!” ????

Common, it could have been a lot worse!!

originally posted 9th August 2018